Children Of Divorce

  The most important thing in divorce is making the children the highest priority of both parties. Children will be scared in life no matter what, but a divorce, depending on how the parents handle it, can make or break them.

Presentation is key. It is vital to show your children in any way possible that they are number one. If parents have to tell them repeatedly that their best interests are at heart, then so be it. Positive reinforcement is extremely helpful. Some examples are:

“If you are with mommy or daddy, I want you to be happy.”

“Be happy wherever you are.”

“Just because mommy and daddy do not live together anymore, doesn’t mean that we don’t love you.”

Tell children that everything is going to be ok.  Reassure them daily that no matter what, they are loved and that the divorce is not their fault.  Support children with extra love and hugs.

Another significant issue to remember with children of divorce is not to use children as a weapon. They are innocent bystanders in conflicts between adults, and it is imperative that they are not manipulated or used against each parent. It is better if no harsh words are said against the other party in the presence of children.